Monday, 4 November 2013

Fish Fillets Noord Zee


Recently, I was approached by Jenny from Silver Screen Suppers to participate in a Vincent Price cook-a-long with other food bloggers from around the world. Turns out that Vincent was also a gourmet cook. (This makes him more scary in my eyes.) Mother thought it was a good way for me to make friends, so I said yes.

Folks, I’ve seen a lot of frightening recipes in my day, but none as terrifying as the one Jenny sent me. The recipe called for “plaice fish” (Where do I find that? Aquarium World?), something called a “fluted tube” (sounds painful) and FOUR cockadoodle frying pans! To make matters worse, I had to whip this up on Halloween night. Have you met the kids in my area? Trust me, they don’t take kindly to waiting.

Anyways, I did what any caker would do and simplified, simplified, simplified. Here’s Vincent’s recipe, followed by my cakerified version. Which is better? I'll leave that in your capable hands, dear reader.

Vincent's recipe
Cook 4 medium potatoes in salted water until very tender. Drain and mash. Beat in 3 tablespoons butter and enough hot cream to make fluffy potatoes that are still stiff enough to be pressed through a fluted pastry tube. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Keep warm over simmering water.

Poach 4 fillets of plaice (about 1 ¼ lb.) in a cup of water with a ½ pint of dry white wine, the juice of one lemon, ½ teaspoon and ¼ teaspoon of white pepper for 5 minutes. Remove fillets and keep warm. Boil liquid over high heat until reduced to a ¼ pint.

Heat 1 tablespoon of butter in each of 4 small frying-pans. In one, sauté 4 oz. of button mushrooms for 5 minutes. In another, 4 oz. shrimp for 5 minutes. In a third, toss 4 oz. herring roes floured for 5 minutes; in the last, cook 4 sliced scallops for 5 minutes.

Fill a forcing bag, fitted with a large fitted tube, with the mashed potatoes and press out fluted ribbon down the centre of a large serving platter. On one side press out 3 ribbons from centre to edge of platter, making 4 evenly divided compartments. Arrange the fillets on the other side in the long compartment. Put platter into a warm oven to keep warm.

Sauce:
In saucepan beat 2 eggs with 1 tablespoon flour and ½ pint cream. Strain ¼ pint of reduced fish liquid into the egg-cream mixture and cook, stirring rapidly, until sauce is hot and slightly thickened. Be careful not to let it boil. Stir in ¼ teaspoon salt, or to taste, and 1 tablespoon lemon juice.

Presentation:
Pour sauce over fish fillets only and garnish with parsley.

MUCH EASIER CAKER VERSION
Take a box of fish sticks and cook according to package directions. Cook instant mashed potatoes according to package directions. Open can of shrimp. Open can of water chestnuts (because who can afford scallops?) Make tapioca (because who can afford herring roes?) Open can of mushrooms.

Put the potatoes in a Ziploc bag with the tip cut off and squeeze it out in some squiggly lines on a platter. Then arrange your mushrooms, shrimps, water chestnuts and tapioca in the compartments. Then add your fish sticks and sprinkle with dried parsley. Eat and ponder what you’re going to do with all your spare time.

What did my fearless fellow food bloggers get up to with their Vincent Price recipe? Check them out:

Jenny of Silver Screen Suppers - Oxtail Creole
Emily of Dinner is Served 1972 – Beef Heart Stewed
Cathy of Battenburg Belle – Deviled Shrimp and Rice
Sally of My Custard Pie – Deviled Rib Bones
Ruth of Mid Century Menu – Unwealthy Wellington
Angela of Glamorous Glutton – Steak Moutarde Flambe
Lauren of The Past on a Plate – Ayrshire Poacher’s Roll
Mimi of The Retro WW Experiment – Chinese Chicken
Carol of Craftypants Carol – Deviled Crab
Erica of Retrorecipe – Cucumber Crocodile and Melon Monster
Susie of Bittersweet Susie – Carolina Deviled Clams
Lisa of Beyond the Fringes – Calf’s Liver Marine
Helen of Zelda’s Secrets – Champignons Grilles Marie Victoire
Saucy Cherie of CookBook Cherie – Liver Risotto

Source: Cooking Price-Wise with Vincent Price

(With all due respect, who's really the wise one here?)










P.S. Bazaar-o-Rama 2013 starts this Friday! Check back for all the crap treasures I found my first weekend.

31 comments:

  1. I am laughing my ass off at your "Cakerized" version! OMG how are you supposed to poach fish AND boil potatoes all at the same time! That's just crazy talk!

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    1. If you ask me, I think Vincent got this recipe from one of those torture movies he starred in.

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  2. This is great! I hope you enjoyed the evening.

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    1. Zelda, I enjoyed it a lot more than if I had followed Vincent's recipe.

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  3. classic :)
    PS those powdered potatoes are so disgusting but I love them. Reminds me of Swiss Chalet or something.

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    1. I hadn't had instant mashed potatoes before (hard to believe), but they were delicious! Tasted like the real thing. Only no lumps.

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  4. Hilarious - I didn't know you could still buy instant mash. Loved reading about your unique take on this.

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    1. You can buy pretty much instant anything in these modern times. Potatoes, pudding, friends. Okay, maybe not friends. Or else I would've tried it.

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  5. Wow, I just don't know what to say about this one other than it's very symmetrical. You photo reminds me of the food montage/credits at the beginning of the Napoleon Dynamite movie. If you haven't watched this movie, you must!

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    1. I love Napoleon Dynamite. It's like watching my adolescence all over again. Less the dance sequence.

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  6. Brian your photo is the most ELEGANT version of Fish Filets Nord Zee I have ever seen. It makes my version look like a right dog's dinner http://vincentennialcookblog.wordpress.com/2011/08/30/fish-fillets-noord-zee/

    Mind you, the comments I received about it could probably be applied to your version too:

    Jim: “I think I have seen this kind of thing in mental hospitals”.

    Alan: “I got served this in hospital when I had my kidney removed”.

    Thank you for participating in the Vincent Price Halloween Cookalong and for revealing to me that you Canadians call "fish fingers" fish sticks - what?!

    For your lovely readers, my blog post for the Cookalong is here - http://www.silverscreensuppers.com/vincent-price/vincent-price-halloween-cookalong

    Jenny xxxxxx

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    1. Jenny, I checked out your version and from here on out, I'll endeavour to use the phrase "piped the mashed potato dykes" into my conversations at least once a day. I'm adding your link to the list above. Thanks for organizing it. It's a Halloween I'll never forget. Interpret that how you wish.

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  7. 4 small frying pans! Wow - that's Hollywood right there!

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    1. I know! I can't even afford one frying pan, let alone four. These movie stars have no grasp on the reality of the working class.

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  8. You are hilarious!!! Half way through I swear I was thinking you were gonna whip out some fish sticks!

    Fab post!!

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    1. Thank you! I admit, I wasn't sure whether to go with breaded or tempura, but decided I wanted some crunch. Cakers like noisy food.

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  9. Yup, I think the Cakerfied version is the superior one--no poaching, no sauteeing, no *peeling* for pity's sake. Veg don't peel.
    Only thing missing is the mayonnaise/pickle relish Tartar Sauce.

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    1. Crap. I knew I was forgetting something. I love TarTar Sauce. Works as a great moisturizer, too.

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  10. Very funny, Love the cakerfied version. GG

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    1. Thank you! I think every recipe needs to be cakerfied. Just think of all the time we'd have on our hands.

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  11. Was it edible? I'm a little worried. But, seriously, scallops have gotten expensive. The last time I bought them they were $20 for enough for two people. Crazy!

    I've now learned, thanks to your blog, that a good chunk of my extended family practice Caker Cooking. To my knowledge, there's no actual word for it in Arkansas. I'm afraid it may just be normal.

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    1. Not only was it edible, it was also delicious. I mean, canned shrimp! Need I say more?

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  12. Well done, sir. (w/slow hand clap)
    And, once again, you've shamed us all with the plating.

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    1. I should be working at that Martha Stewartson magazine. That's how talented I am.

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  13. OMG - that has to be the most creative ingredient substitution I've ever seen! I was with you on the fish sticks...and even the water chestnuts....but tapioca pudding?

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    1. I was pretty proud of myself for thinking of that one. Any excuse to include more tapioca into my diet is a good one.

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  14. You kill me! I think your approach makes a lot more sense.

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    1. Thank you. I try to be the voice of reason wherever I go.

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  15. I keep seeing these odd things in your plating. यह हिंदी लेखन की तरह एक सा लग रहा है.

    This dist looks like a fantastical rendering of written Hindi!

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    1. I thought you were talking some kind of new lingo, Melanie. As in, "This dist sure looks good."
      I kept seeing odd things in my plate, too. The dried parsley bore a startling resemblance to my mother's third cousin.

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